Stop Living On Auto-Pilot
Midlife sneaks up on us. Once upon a time, you may have actively pursued a career, marriage, and/or having kids. Then one day you wake up and not only do you realize you're halfway through your time here, you also can’t remember the last time you actively sought to shape your life.
As my episode 13 guest author and speaker Antonio Neves says, perhaps you’ve been living on autopilot, allowing societal expectations and unconscious habits to dictate your choices. Antonio suggests that when we stop examining who we’ve become and still long to be, we default to a single overarching pursuit: Seeking external validation, which leaves us feeling empty despite our achievements.
If this sounds familiar, ask yourself these questions:
Are you truly happy?
If nothing in your life changes, are you heading towards a fulfilling future?
Are you emotionally present?
Are you acting out or withdrawing from loved ones due to an underlying sense of dissatisfaction with yourself and/or your life?
What is the biggest lie you’re telling yourself?
Do not wait for a crisis to jolt you awake. Midlife is an opportunity to take stock and make conscious choices about the path ahead.
According to Antonio, here are some ways to get off autopilot:
Tap into your intuition. Disconnect from technology and reconnect with yourself through walks, meditation, or quiet contemplation.
Embrace emotional honesty. Don't suppress your feelings. Find healthy outlets for expressing your emotions, whether it's through journaling, therapy, or conversations with trusted friends.
Prioritize self-care and connection. Antonio’s top 5 activities for a great day are exercise, meaningful connections, tech-free time, accomplishing tasks, and continuous learning.
Shift your perspective. Instead of playing not to lose, adopt a play to win mentality.
Rediscover activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Seek feedback. Antonio’s 30-day rule encourages us to evaluate our behavior and seek honest feedback from those closest to us, asking the direct question “Would you rehire / remarry me based on my behavior over the last 30 days?”
Top-5 takeaways from my interview with Antonio:
External validation is fleeting. True fulfillment comes from within.
Emotional honesty is crucial. Don't suppress your feelings; find healthy ways to express them.
Small daily actions create big changes. Prioritize self-care, connection, and continuous growth.
Seek feedback and show up authentically. Live with intention and give your best to the people you love.
Midlife isn't a crisis; it's an opportunity.
Jon
